Saturday, February 28, 2009
it's been a long long week
and i didn't know how i survived it
started off the week with a fever of 38.4 degrees
didn't want to take MC since the next day was 16km road march
went on with the activities with a high fever + an injured knee
tuesday my fever went down to 37 odd
and my knee was painful like shit
16km road march was a torture
it was raining, my fever rose to 38 and my knee gave way
first time in 3 months i feel like falling out
my morale was low, missing her yet can't do anything
but i didn't gave in
marched in the rain though lagging behind
with a 38 degrees fever and an injured knee
slept through the night shivering
wednesday went to see the doctor
he gave my offs but it was live grenade week
so i still had to go outfield
long 4, lvb i went under the hot sun
my fever rose back to 38+ once again
survived yet another 2 days and here i am
sitting infront of my comp
1 week i didn't want to talk
i didn't want to sms
i know there's nothing more left for me
i pushed myself to the limits
i made that decision for myself
im going sispec
im giving up civilian life
what's there more for me to cherish in the outside world
than my family and friends
i chose this road down
tell me that you didn't mean what you said
tell me you miss me
tell me you love me
tell me that all you said was a lie
i'll give up everything once again
to be with you
training doesn't make perfect
perfect training makes perfect
i rant my rants @ 8:06 AM
Sunday, February 22, 2009
i suck
i suck
i suck
i suck
i suck
i suck
i suck
i suck
was there even anything that i did good?
was there even anything that i said right?
was there even any love from me to you that i gave?
was there even anything worth remembering?
was there even care and concern that i gave before?
i guess after so many things
and so much time
everything i do just wasn't enough
i'm just not good enough for anything
i guess i know it
i guess its time i realise
i guess its time to go
somewhere i belong
gonna work myself off from now
goodbye
a hug, a kiss, a hand hold, a love
such things seems so far away now
but i'm glad i once loved
i rant my rants @ 7:14 PM
Sunday, February 15, 2009
love is a simple feeling
yet complicated to understand
valentines didn't turn out how i expected to be
but to me, seeing you after so long
is really a present to me
though promises are hard to keep
i wanted to believe
its hard to love
but its easy to be loved
im really lost sometimes on how you actually feel..
well i'm booking in
i'm going outfield for 3days 2nights
no hp and i wonder would you know how much i'll miss you
you maybe having fun outside
while i'm lying on the ground
facing the starry skies of tekong
missing your every actions
missing your every smile
i hope you'll know
and i hope you'll feel the same way too
someday i hope
and i believe
my love will be returned too
my dedication to kelly :)
nice week guys
3 more weeks to POP~ =)
love is giving people the ability to hurt you
but trusting them not to
i rant my rants @ 4:59 PM
Sunday, February 08, 2009
im booking in in like 1hour time
time passes so fast especially the weekends
im still really considering command school to being a man
free time for the next 2 years
or endure 6-10 months and much more free time for 1 year
kinda hard for me to decide
since im not into the chiong sua attitude now
if i go chiong sua means im gonna have so little time for you
im scared of losing you to time
its always been a big factor
even now im afraid ):
this coming valentine it will be special i hope
never really spend valentine with someone i like/love before
this will be the first year i guess
never had plannings or surprises before too
hope this time my plan goes well
im happy that you forgave me
if only i had more time
baby, i will be waiting for your answer still
book in time, cya guys next week
going to POP lo!
oh yeah, did i say
i miss kelly? :p
i love the way you talk to me
i love the way you joke with me
i love the way you sleep
and i love the way you are youanother old song i never got tired listening to...
find the song online or smth
its by a singapore old band, meng fei chuan! =p
Should I Stay - Dreamz FMHad a drive
Driven by your love
But when you messed around
I lost the drive I found
Thought you needed
Needed someone true
But you changed your mind
Or had I failed you?
Wish you�d been
Careful with my heart
But you tore it apart
And broke an angel�s heart
The kiss was true
Has to end somehow
But I am livin� proof of what love is about
It�s hard holding you
Loving you, losing you
It�s sad to be true
And be fooled by you
I don�t know (I don�t know)
I gotta know
Should I stay or should I go?
You played me on
Played me like a clown
But I feel for you
Eventhough I�m down
My heart is heavy
Heavy like a rock
But I am so amused
You're still in my thoughts
It's hard holding you
Loving you, losing you
It's sad to be true
And be fooled by you
I don't know (I don't know)
I gotta know
Should I stay or should I go?
Oooohh should I stay?
Should I go?
It's hard holding you
Loving you, losing you
It's sad to be true
And be fooled by you
I don't know (I don't know)
I wanna know
Should I stay or should I go?
This time its done
It'll never feel the same
But we had some good times
Guess it's sad just the same
I guess the truth
Doesn't matter somehow
But you were livin' proof of what love is about
i rant my rants @ 5:50 PM
Saturday, February 07, 2009
and i hope things will be going well again
im going out soon to get some prezzie
i miss making wanton for my buddies for vday/friendship day
guess they still remember =p
oh well, 1 more week
hope everything goes to plan
missing you, but can't feel it
i rant my rants @ 2:22 PM
been 2 weeks since i last updated
been a rough week since last week
having more downs than ups
hurt myself in camp, having ankle sprains, cut on the toe
getting my confinement soon and stuff
many things really troubled me and i'm not feeling really good
many things ain't going right too
when i thought i was on my way
looks like things always ain't so simple
i'm not sleeping well in camp recently
keep waking up in the middle of the night
checking my hp and stuff
feeling paranoid
its hard being in my shoes this week i supposed
every night i'm hoping my hp will just beep
but it remained quiet for the past week
empty promises, and everything else
how i wish my week will be better
do you remember those promises we had
the nights we used to had
where have they gone?
the comments i was supposed to be flooded on
i'm making my mind up now
looks like OCS is really the choice given to me
i'm thinking real hard..
but words just won't explain how i felt
been listening to the radio in camp
came across this song that really put how i feel now
into words...
guess i'm sorry,
and i hope we still will have the date on the date you promised
seeing your personal message made me feel so disorientated
3 weeks i've been looking forward to that day
now everything's gone
all i can hope for,
is that your lying..
oh well, here's the song
and i've changed my blog song to it too
really nice and beautiful
i love you, i really do
but why must it end up this way
its hurting me way too much than i expected
can you feel my pain?Best Of Me - Daniel PowterYou know I'm hoping you'll sing along
Although it's not your favorite song
Don't want to be there
when there's nothing left to say
You know that some of us spin again
And when you do you need a friend
Don't want to be there
when there's nothing left for me
And I hate the thought of finally being erased
Baby that's the best of me
Everything's behind you
But the hopeless signs beside you
I'm living in the moment
Have I wasted all your time?
Was it something that I said?
Was it something that I did?
Or the combination of both that did me in?
You know I'm hoping you'll sing along
Although it's not your favorite song
Don't want to be there
when there's nothing left to say
You know that some of us spin again
And when you do you need a friend
Don't want to be there
when there's nothing left for me
And I hate the thought of finally being erased
Baby that's the best of me
i rant my rants @ 1:39 AM